Pump For Ms. Delia

Might Be Your Last Chance To Jerk Off!

You are good, so give yourself a hand!  Are you up for a little self-intimacy? Go ahead, caress yourself.  Let’s see you do some serious self-loving, some self-fucking.  You are now, fucking for one.  Fuck yourself.  Or maybe fuck by yourself.  Pretend you are in public: show everyone, show the crowd, show the audience how you self-deal.  What’s your favorite card game?  Solitaire.  Yes, it is, just like solitary sex is your favorite form of sex, right?

I Give You Permission To Stroke

Make today awesome, masturbate.  You know what you are?  You’re a goon.  Question: When is it a good time to masturbate?  I say ANYTIME is a good time to masturbate.  My name may be Ms. Delia, but from time to time, I want you to address me as “Enabler Delia.”  You’re going to pump your life away . . . And love every minute of it!

You’re Not A Real Man

A real man would track me down, rip off my panties, and fuck me.  You, however, are perfectly content with heavy breathing induced by masturbation!   You, slut, are a FISTFUCKER.  When people shake your hand, do they know that’s your handpussy?  Oh, that’s right, you’re a lefty! Keep stroking, and you’ll qualify as a “Pump Pig.”  Would you like to be a Pump Pig?  Fuck your hand.  After all, it’s Fist Fuck Friday.  Oops, it’s not Friday.  Let go. Stop, Cease.  You feel alive when you stroke, don’t you.  C’mon,





Aren’t you tired of all the effort, energy, and skill it takes to get laid?  Of course, you are!  Better to simply masturbate: that’s just so much easier, don’t you think?