They Don’t Put a Masturbatorium In The Listings
So, you know Ms. Delia has moved. And I’m looking for a new house to buy…and I made an offer that got accepted, so I guess I AM buying a house. Now in talking with my Epic Edger, he told me about a special room he has in his home – his Masturbatorium! It’s like a man-cave, but for strokers and solo sexuals. Kevin considers himself a solo sexual because while he does have sex rarely with his wife, he’s much happier jerking off. So, he’s created a special place for himself to do that. In all the listings I’ve looked at for houses, I haven’t seen Masturbatorium listed once!
I’ll Bet You All Have A Masturbatorium
The Masturbatorium is where you go when you are, as Kevin says ITMM – In the Masturbating Mood. Do you have a special room in the house you head to when you call me for a tease and denial, guided masturbation session? Some where you can have privacy while you’re pounding your pud? That’s your Masturbatorium!
Making Your Masturbatorium Special
Now, to truly have an Epic Edger worthy Masturbatorium, you need to make it special. All your lubes, oils and lotions should be easy to reach. You should make sure you have whatever masturbatory aids you need – porn, computer, internet access. Of course, you should have a phone in there – or some way to reach me – just the computer would work, you can Skype or sexy text me! And make sure you have clean-up supplies – no one likes a messy Masturbatorium!
So, settle in to your special place, and give Ms. Delia a call! Oh, and check out the poll and let me know if we should put a Masturbatorium in the new house for Jack!
Oh Ms Delia, You know where my Masturbatorium is and i am so glad You have visited it so frequently. Since my abode is rather small, i don’t always have the luxury of leaving it completely set up all of the time, but since i have such a limited number of real visitors, i find myself finding new places to put away implements and accouterments in relatively plain site, in case the energy in a session calls for something unplanned for.
i confess, there are still several reminders laying out from Your last visit, that would have to be hastily stashed if someone showed up, but what’s the fun of being naughty without just a but of risk? 😉
i can hardly wait for Your next virtual visit.
Hi Delia,
Thanks 😉 I’m in my masturbatorium right now. (Hmmmmm, better use “add to dictionary” for that word.) I have Amanda in mine. (Only $5,499 from realdoll.com) What else would you counsel that I add to my masturbatorium? Sincerely, ITMM
P.S. I’ll bet Mistess Lilly would suggest corn starch.
Oh ITMM…
I can think of lots of things to add to the masturbatorium!! 🙂 Lubes, sleeves, vibes, and more…always more to intensify and better masturbation!
Ms. Layla was always a big fan of cornstarch as well! I am glad the idea is getting around. For me, I do not love it for stroking as I find it gets sticky with precum. It loses its appeal for me 😉
kneel –
I do really enjoy visiting the masturbatorium!! 🙂 Seeing all the toys on display is super sexy!! 🙂
Each new visit brings some sexy fun, doesn’t it?
Delia, Yes, you most definitely should have a masturbatorium for Jack in your new house. If it’s a room, however, be sure that it is YOU who have the one an only key. Or, perhaps simply designate a corner of a large room for Jack to go solo. This way, everyone understands the stakes: at any moment, you (or a house guest 😉 could happen upon Jack “in flagrante delicto” and in all his glory. Would Jack like that? Or does he prefer to take his masturbation in privacy?
As your husband, he may not have a say in the matter, though it would be nice for you to know the answer. My masturbatorium is quite private. But, I hope to advance to the point where I have only a corner of our great room as the locale for my solo work. I think that would be pleasing to my wife. The toys of course we can keep hidden (we don’t want to scare off our normal friends). Also, to keep my masturbatorium private implies that there is something wrong with masturbation. Is there? Isn’t keeping a private masturbatorium proof of self-hatred for a solosexual? Or is it merely the price we pay for our out of the mainstream sexuality? What do you think Delia?
Oh kevin!
I am going to write up a bit on this. With Jack, I certainly have “masturbation fascination” bordering on a bit of obsession…but I do have a specific fetish 😉
Great questions I will answer in an upcoming blog for sure!